Business Networking

How to Say No – Without Damaging Your Relationships

September 21, 2011 By Barry

A “no” uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a “yes” merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble.

– Mahatma Gandhi

One of the biggest reasons why people don’t like to say no is because they don’t want to damage a relationship.

There’s a great book called The Power of a Positive No by William Ury. The basis of this book is that there has to be an underlying yes that causes you to say no. The book gives a three-step process:

Step #1: Uncovering your “yes”

What’s the “yes” that you’re committed to, or that you believe in, or that you’re passionate about? This might be your family, your health, your well being, or doing work that you love.

In order to find a “yes”, it’s really important to understand our values, our beliefs, our commitments and our priorities. If we understand those things, we can make decisions that fit with them. Sometimes, that requires us to say “no” – but it also allows the person on the other side of the “no” to understand our reasoning.

Step #2: Empower your “no”

Use your “yes” as a reason and a justification to help you recognize that “no” is an appropriate response.

Saying “no” is about being present to what matters – and if we don’t say “no”, it costs us.

Step #3: Find an alternative “yes”

Decline the request gracefully, and instead of just saying “no”, offer an additional option or suggestion to help the person solve the problem, without you necessarily being involved.

When I have to say “no” to someone, I acknowledge that the request that they’re making does appear important, valuable, useful and/or relevant. I share the circumstances that prevent me from helping, or that have me make a different choice.

Observe your unhealthy yes’s and unhealthy no’s and reflect on what works and what doesn’t work. For instance, you might know that you need seven hours sleep to be your best, so you don’t want to say “yes” to a friend’s request to have another drink in the evening.

Take a moment to think about the things that you want to say “yes” to in your life. Is there anything that you need to say “no” to, as a result of these?

10 Really Good Business Networking Tips

July 28, 2010 By Barry

At first glance, networking appears to be a very easy activity. However, like anything else in your professional life, to be great at it requires a lot of time and effort. In our series the Do’s and Dont’s of Networking, we offer additional tips on how to best approach networking opportunities and functions.

Ask the question “How would I know if somebody I know would be a good prospect for you?”
Focus on others, rather than on your needs, at networking events.
Give many referrals to others.
Network with people with outstanding reputations.
Avoid trying to sell people in your network.
Make a good first impression in your attire, manners, and attitude.
Come prepared with a good pen, business cards, and other materials.
Learn how to gracefully escape from long-winded conversations.
Does your personal introduction pass the “So What?” test?
Cell phones should be left in the car or turned off.

Barry Demp is a highly-skilled michigan business and personal coach focused on the areas of leadership, management, coaching, team building, networking, business development, communication skills, relationship building, motivation, time management, life balance, and goal achievement. He specializes in working with business owners, executives, coaches, consultants, and high-potential professionals by helping them significantly increase their productivity, profitability, and life balance. For more information or assistance, please contact Barry Demp at 248-740-3231 or visit www.dempcoaching.com.

Be An Outstanding Networker

July 21, 2010 By Barry

Is it terribly difficult to be an outstanding business networker? Some people may say yes, others may say no. However, one thing is true. We all remember and like the really good networkers in our lives. A question to ponder is “How can we help you become the networker that you admire”?

Here are some suggestions:

Your non-vocational interests as opportunities to network.
Meet personally with the majority of individuals in your networking groups.
Attend my networking meetings consistently. Out of sight means out of mind!
Bring other professionals to your networking events.
Make the first move in meeting and engaging others in conversation.
Learn to be masterful at the use of open-ended questions and layering (who, what, where, when, why, how).
Be very well read in your area of expertise and in business in general.
Take a proactive approach to connecting with others.
Be an outstanding listener.
Consider giving speeches to various groups about your area of expertise.

Barry Demp is a highly-skilled business and personal coach focused on the areas of leadership, management, coaching, team building, networking, business development, communication skills, relationship building, motivation, time management, life balance, and goal achievement. He specializes in working with business owners, executives, coaches, consultants, and high-potential professionals by helping them significantly increase their productivity, profitability, and life balance. For more information or assistance, please contact Barry Demp at 248-740-3231 or visit www.dempcoaching.com.

Personal and Business Networking Tips

June 30, 2010 By Barry

As a continuation of our blog series on the Do’s and Dont’s of Networking, we are exploring additional tips and strategies on how to become a more effective networker.

Have a great interest in others and have masterful listening skills.
Develop excellent relationships with the officers, leaders, and organizers of my networking venues.
Make requests for introductions to people who these leaders believe are a good fit for me.
Be specific when you make requests for assistance.
Networking only begins at the networking event. Go out of your way to set up follow-up networking opportunities on a one-on-one basis.
Consider a personal advisory panel that helps you build your business.
Networking is a mutual exchange of information, ideas, and resources. Be generous!
When you give something of value, politely look for a way the other person can help you in return (reciprocity).
Be very consistent in your networking activities.
Have a list of centers of influence and strategic referral partners.

Barry Demp is a highly-skilled business and personal coach focused on the areas of leadership, management, coaching, team-building, networking, business development, communication skills, relationship building, motivation, time management, life balance, and goal achievement. He specializes in working with business owners, executives, coaches, consultants, and high-potential professionals by helping them significantly increase their productivity, profitability, and life balance. For more information or assistance, please contact Barry Demp at 248-740-3231 or visit www.dempcoaching.com.