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Interview with Doug Gfeller, Part Four: Using Social Media to Build Your Online Presence

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In this fourth and final excerpt (8 mins) from my interview with Doug Gfeller on The Coaching Perspective, we discuss the following:

  • My use of social media, and my tips on using it to build your online presence.
  • How “GIG” (the “Great Idea Group”) encouraged me to use technology more proactively and effectively.
  • How I use LinkedIn effectively, and why the premium version may well be worth investing in.
  • The importance of using social media in order to contribute. If people associate you with value, they’ll come back and want more.

Click “play” below to listen to this part of the interview:

[audio:http://www.thequotablecoach.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/CoachingPerspective-Part4.mp3|titles=Barry Demp and Doug Gfeller, “The Coaching Perspective”]

You can listen to the full interview, and other interviews with me, on my Podcasts page.

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How to Say No – Without Damaging Your Relationships

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A “no” uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a “yes” merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble.

– Mahatma Gandhi

One of the biggest reasons why people don’t like to say no is because they don’t want to damage a relationship.

There’s a great book called The Power of a Positive No by William Ury. The basis of this book is that there has to be an underlying yes that causes you to say no. The book gives a three-step process:

Step #1: Uncovering your “yes”

What’s the “yes” that you’re committed to, or that you believe in, or that you’re passionate about? This might be your family, your health, your well being, or doing work that you love.

In order to find a “yes”, it’s really important to understand our values, our beliefs, our commitments and our priorities. If we understand those things, we can make decisions that fit with them. Sometimes, that requires us to say “no” – but it also allows the person on the other side of the “no” to understand our reasoning.

Step #2: Empower your “no”

Use your “yes” as a reason and a justification to help you recognize that “no” is an appropriate response.

Saying “no” is about being present to what matters – and if we don’t say “no”, it costs us.

Step #3: Find an alternative “yes”

Decline the request gracefully, and instead of just saying “no”, offer an additional option or suggestion to help the person solve the problem, without you necessarily being involved.

When I have to say “no” to someone, I acknowledge that the request that they’re making does appear important, valuable, useful and/or relevant. I share the circumstances that prevent me from helping, or that have me make a different choice.

Observe your unhealthy yes’s and unhealthy no’s and reflect on what works and what doesn’t work. For instance, you might know that you need seven hours sleep to be your best, so you don’t want to say “yes” to a friend’s request to have another drink in the evening.

Take a moment to think about the things that you want to say “yes” to in your life. Is there anything that you need to say “no” to, as a result of these?

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Networking Tips for Legal and Financial Professionals

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A shift has occurred with how businesses and individuals make their purchasing decisions for legal and financial management services.  No longer do prospective clients blindly engage these services without first seeking the advice of a trusted contact or the critical review of third party comments on any social network.

Because of this trend, and now more than ever, professionals in the legal, banking, accounting, and financial sectors in the Detroit metro area are openly expressing the importance for creating a reliable new business development process for their practices.
As a Master Certified Coach in Michigan, I have had the wonderful opportunity to speak to and train professionals in all of these practice areas throughout my coaching career and have found that a formal process for sales definitely needs to be in their DNA.
Some of the key business development needs that I hear about from these professionals are:
  1. Developing more effective networking skills  
  2. Having a proper process to use for qualifying prospective clients  
  3. Knowing what a good prospective client looks like

Here are some quick, but very effective tips, for to address these business development concerns:  

  1. Ask, “What is it that I can listen for that is a good referral for you?” to people that you meet at a networking or social event instead of immediately telling them what you do. 
  2. Are you asking enough good, open-ended questions in your discovery process to determine if the prospect is really a good fit for you?  In my training sessions we call this technique layer.  Learn more here.    
  3. Do a 5 minute inventory of your client base.  Determine who your favorite clients are and what makes them your favorite clients.  It may be that they pay quickly, have a unique product or service, or show great integrity under tough circumstances.
Barry Demp is a highly-skilled business coach focused on the areas of leadership, management, coaching, team-building, networking, business development, communication skills, relationship building, motivation, time management, life balance, and goal achievement. He specializes in working with business owners, executives, coaches, consultants, and high-potential professionals by helping them significantly increase their productivity, profitability, and life balance.
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